I should have known…more than you ever wanted to know about Kelly Yacono

May 3, 2011

Kelly Yacono took some time out to tell AD a few secrets, a few lies, and several other things, some of which are printed below.

Tell us a little about your character.
Well, I consider myself a generous person, I like to think of myself as humorous, happy….wait…did you mean my character in the play? I misunderstood the assignment….

What’s your favorite thing about playing Lisa Milkmin

I have never played a character like Milkmin before. It’s so much fun for me because we are exact opposites. She’s manipulative, devious and trendy. 3 things I’m totally not (at least I don’t think I am). If Milkmin and I went to the same Jr. High she would have made fun of me constantly…..then pretend to be my friend and coerce me into giving her my lunch money.

What was the first show you ever did?
My first show was the Fantasticks. Long story long, 16 year old Kelly saw a notice to audition for Grease (which at the time was her absolute favorite musical). But 16 year old Kelly had a problem. She was supposed to be on the varsity softball team that year. What to do? Quit softball (which had been her life since 2nd grade up to that point) or miss out on possibly being part of her favorite musical? So, Kelly 16 built up the courage to go up to varsity Coach Murphy and tell him she wasn’t trying out for softball that year. She expected Coach Murphy to blow a gasket but instead, he hugged her and wished her luck. Aw. Kelly 16 auditioned for what she thought was going to be Grease but something happened and the musical turned into The Me Nobody Knows aka the Musical Rarely Anyone Knows. Kelly 16 got a singing role! Huzzah! What happened next is a little hazy so I’ll just say due to circumstances beyond the school board’s control, the musical once again changed to The Fantasticks. Kelly 16 was given the part of Ladder Mover Number 1. Sadness. But then something miraculous happened! Someone dropped out of the musical! And since Kelly 16 was such a ham back then (back then she says. like anything’s changed) she was given the role of Henry. She didn’t get to sing, but she did get to wear a bald cap, a spirit gummed mustache, and act as a befuddled old man tripping and falling onstage. It also solidified her love for slapstick comedy. The rest as they say…You were recast three times before the show started?  Did that prove to be an omen of some kind?  Did you ever get to sing in high school?
You’d think, right? In the end, it was the best experience I had in high school. After that, I was hooked on theatre. And yes! I DID get to sing in high school. I was lucky enough be in my high school’s production of Bye, Bye Birdie as Mrs. MacAfee.

What is your dream role?
This is such a tough question. I like roles that are interesting, unpredictable, and out of my comfort zone or productions that tackle new angles or push boundaries. If we’re going for dream of dreams probably not in my future, Elphaba from Wicked.

You get one super-power.  What is it?
I’d have to say a combo of Phoenix Jean Gray/Professor Xavier so it’s a balance of good and evil. Phoenix Jean Gray is badass but a little too unstable. I’d like a dash of Professor X to keep things level. Can I do that? Technically, they DO have the same super power….

I hate to look like I’m trying to out dork you here, but while Charles Xavier was telepathic, Jean Gray was telepathic and telekinetic as well as …(What followed here was a long rambling commentary on the differences between Charles Xavier and Jean Gray and has been cut for it’s extremely high nerd quotient.) So would you go full on Phoenix with all that entails or settle for Jean Gray?
Oh, dude. You just pwned the hell outta me. Given this new information, I’d go full on Phoenix.

Magic genie.  Three wishes.  Go.
1) For all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.
2) Do a huge grossing movie, get paid residuals, and do theatre the rest of my days. 
3) I’d wish the genie to be free!What really pisses you off?  I mean REALLY.  I’m talking murderous rage here.
Condescending people. Ooooh, I cain’t STAN’ you!What is your personal motto?
I try to remember this one as often as I can: “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
Nice.  How deep into Dune did you get?  What did you think of the crazy David Lynch adaptation?
Man. You’re so calling me out on all my crap today. Dune is actually on my list of things to read. My girlfriend is a huge Dune fan and she showed me the Litany of Fear. It’s such a great way to face life when you’re feeling the most insecure. I imagine the David Lynch version was, well, David Lynch-y. Dune is next after the Dark Tower series.

If, hypothetically someone wanted to seduce you, how would they go about it?  In theory.
I guess I’d have to answer your question with another question…..What kind of bear is best?

Hmmmmm.  I’m kindof torn between the Spectacled Bear and the Sri Lankan Sloth Bear.  Unless we’re bringing fictitious bears into this.  Then I’d have to go with Fozzie Bear from the Muppet Show.  So, what would that make the answer?
False.  Black Bear.

Who do you consider a modern-day demigod?
Charlie Sheen


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